Ramona's Precious Secret Little Life
by TrixieStixs
Summary: Ever wonder what really happened in Ramona's past? Like how all these ex's became evil? I know you do! Find out in this truly epic fan fiction that explores one of my favorite characters of all time... Ramona V. Flowers!


**Ramona's Precious Secret Little Life**

**By: TrixieStixs**

**Chapter One: The First Day **

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"**Faking**

**There's nothing here worth taking,**

**Just my reflection, fading on the wall**

**Not the fairest one of all**

**I'm looking for a place I'll never see again." **

**-The Birthday Massacre "Sleepwalking" **

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"Rammy, are you excited for the first day at your new school?" A man in his mid thirties asked as he shook a large bulge that was protruding from under a blue comforter. The man rolled his almond colored eyes before trying to communicate with his daughter again. "Ramona, if you don't get up you're going to be late. You don't want to be late for your first day of school, do you?"

The blob of mass shook as a girl's head, she was about thirteen-years-old, popped out of it. The girl had oak brown hair that was a few inches past her shoulders, it was a mess as Ramona had just woke up and her hair had the classic case of "bed head". Ramona's head then rolled over and faced her father. "You know, the excitement kind of runs thin after the eighth time dad," Ramona smiled as she slowly sat up from her bed and stretched her arms out before yawning. Ramona did have a valid complaint, it was her eighth school in the span of two years.

"Well, I'm sorry about that Rammy. It's just hard for me to stay in one place. I've never really been able too," Ramona's father sympathetically chuckled as he said the last part of the statement. He then rubbed his black hair with his right hand before telling his daughter, "You better hurry and get ready, I'll fix you some breakfast."

The man playful shook his daughter's hair before standing up and leaving her room so she could get ready. Ramona then dragged herself into the bathroom that was in the next room over on her right hand side. After a quick shower she put on her clothes for the day; a simple checkered skirt with black leggings, a long sleeve sweater vest, and a pair of black converses. She then slipped her favorite accessory on her finger, A star ring that she was never seen without. Ramona then made her way into the average looking kitchen as she sat down at the round wooden table in the center of the room.

"I've made your favorite… Count Chocula!" Ramona's dad smiled as he placed the bowl of cereal on the table in front of his daughter. He then put his right forearm in front of his mouth as he said, in a horrible vampire impression, "I want to eat your cereal!"

"You're so lame dad. You know that… right?" Ramona smiled as she started eating her cereal.

The two then sat in silence as Ramona's father drank his coffee and Ramona ate her cereal. It was awkwardly silent as you could visibly see the only sounds that were being emitted in the room. The **Sip **from Ramona's dad drinking his coffee and the **Crunch **from Ramona chewing her cereal. This went on for a couple of minutes before Ramona's dad finally broke the silence by saying, "So, is this smoking a full-time or part-time thing?" **(Busted!)**

Ramona's heart sank, even though you could not tell it from her face. She tried to keep her composure as she responded to the question by saying, "Oh, ugh. It's, it's just something I do when I'm bored or stressed." Ramona then nervously darted her eyes around the room afraid to make eye contact with her father as she waited for his response.

It felt like an eternity before the man simply responded, "It's alright Rammy." He chuckled before continuing his thought on the matter, "I used to do the same thing at your age. I hope you know that you'll get ugly if you smoke to much though, right?"

"I'm guessing you smoked to much when you we're my age huh?" Ramona smiled after breathing a sigh of relief at her dad's response.

"Don't push your luck girl. Now hurry up and eat before you're late for school." Ramona's dad said as he waved his right hand's index finger at his daughter.

"Alright… _father_"

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**Hell On Earth… I Mean **_**Phoenix Down Middle School**_**.**

"Have a great day at school Rammy," Ramona's dad said as he waved goodbye at his daughter from the seat of his car before driving off.

Ramona then tossed her teal colored backpack over her shoulder as she began walking towards one of the three buildings of the school that could be seen from the parking lot. It was a nice average looking school with a few trees planted in front of the middle building; the biggest of the three that could be seen from the parking lot. Ramona hurried to her classroom, she was close to being tardy even though her dad sped over there as fast as he could. She picked up her pace as she passed a sign in front of the school that read.

**Phoenix Down Middle School**

"**Reviving your child's intelligence, daily!"**

Ramona gained her composure, and breath, as she stood in front of a door that read "104". Ramona rolled her eyes as she opened the door to her classroom. A look of dread filled her face as she saw what was waiting for her inside that room. It wasn't so much the classroom itself, that was normal enough. The only thing weird was the stuff written on the whiteboard; "The Cake Is A Lie!", "You Were Almost A Jill Sandwich!", and the classic "Only you can prevent forest fires!" were just a few examples. Ramona had a bigger problem with the people that occupied the classroom.

The class was filled with nothing but preppy cheerleader wannabe girls and white muscular jocks. It was the two types of people that the thirteen-year-old Ramona hated most in her young life. The worst part was that virtual hearts could be seen coming from all the little jock's heads as their eyes even seemed to turn into hearts. Ramona rolled her eyes as the teacher called her over to the front of the class.

The teacher was wearing standard teaching attire, he was a man in his late thirties who was already showing early signs of balding. He then loudly cleared his throat, to get the attention of the class, and introduced Ramona to the students, "Students I'd like to introduce you to the new student in class, Ramona V. Flowers." Ramona's face somehow showed more dread as the jocks began floating from their infatuation of her. The teacher seeing this said and motioned to the class to settle down before looking over at Ramona and telling her to, "Go and find an open seat."

Ramona grudgingly strolled over to a seat that was open. She ended up finding a spot that was in-between one of the many jocks and a scrawny looking kid that's time was invested in his gameboy. Ramona let out a silent grown as she sat down in her seat. She could almost sense that the jock was going to try and talk to her, and sure enough, "Hey babe, what's up? The name's Chad." Ramona rolled her eyes at him as she read his status box.

**Name: Chad Chaderson**

**Age: 13**

**Status: A complete douche**

**Fun Fact: If he was around today he'd be a total bro!**

**(Alright let me explain this… with this!)**

**How To Spot A Douche, 90's Edition:**

**1. Is he wearing a button up shirt with the top three buttons unbuttoned like a bad guy from an 80's movie?… Check!**

**2. Does he have a face and voice that makes you want to punch him in the face… with a knife?… Check!**

**3. Does he consider himself better then everyone else? Does he think he can get any girl? Does he have a small penis?… Check, Check, and Double-Check! **

"Leave me alone, asshole!" Ramona told the jock as she glared at the teenage boy.

"Oh, I see, your just playing hard to get," A smile plastered on Chad's ugly face. Ramona said nothing as she turned away from the teenager. In fact she said nothing to him for the rest of the day, infuriating Chad to no end.

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**Later On That Day! (Read in epic voice… k thnxs bye!)**

Ramona was on her way out of the school when a large shadowy figure called from behind her, "Hey Ramona! So, are we going to walk home together?" Chad then creepily creaked his knuckles in a menacing way as if to tell her that it was in her best interest to walk home with him.

"Whoo dude! A little abrasive now aren't we?" Ramona responded in a cool and relaxed tone. **(Yes, Ramona, at the age of thirteen, has an impressive vocabulary. DEAL WITH IT!)**

"What?" Chad asked not understanding her above average vocabulary.

Ramona rolled her eyes before responding, "What are you going to do if I say no? Take my lunch money?" She laughed as she said the last statement, shaking her head at the jock a few feet in front of her.

"Yeah, yeah I am!" Chad said with a smile on his face. **(Oh pardon the interruption but I for got to add that to the list. You're defiantly a douche if you take a girls lunch money!)**

Then, seemingly out of nowhere, a voice called out, "Hey Chad! I think you need to learn how to take no for an answer!"

Ramona and Chad then confusingly turned to see who had just entered the conversation. To both of their surprise, it was Ramona's other desk neighbor. The scrawny kid with the gameboy. Chad then laughed at the smaller teenager before saying, "What are you going to do about it? Loser!"

**Cue awesome Final Fantasy VII boss battle music! Seriously just go listen to that song on you tube or something… It's AMAAAAZING!**

That cool little transition thing happened and Chad and the kid stood a few feet across from each other. A time bar could be seen by the bottom of both their legs, they seemed to be charging at the same time. The gameboy kid's bar filled up first as red sparks shot out from the bottom of his shoes. He must have had a limit or something. He then charged and delivered an array of about ten different kind of punches, he then finished with a strong kick to Chad's head. He then went back to his starting position, as the number one went over Chad's head. **(Hold on a second… all that only did one damage? I'm calling bullshit on my own story!)**

Chad then laughed as his bar filled up, and delivering one punch, he did 9999 damage to the poor little guy. Everything went back to normal as Chad continued to laugh at the poor guy's expense. When Chad finally stopped laughing he then told the kid still chucking at a few parts, "Hold on, I have to go and tell everyone this loser tried to beat me up. HA! I wish we could have had a camera, we could have sent that over to Bob Saget at AFV!" Chad then kept laughing as took off looking for his other friends.

"I could have handled that by myself," Ramona told the teen as she bent down to look at him.

The kid then smiled at her as blood was flowing out of his nose. He also had a few lacerations and a black eye from the punches he took from Chad. He then chuckled and told Ramona, "You sure have a funny way of thanking people."

"Well, maybe if you would have won. But, you kind of just got beat up pretty bad." Ramona laughed as she stood up from her crouched position. The last statement caused to boy to frown. Ramona noticed this before she finished her train of thought, "But thanks for the help anyway? What's your name?"

The boy stood up, still a little bit wobbly, and put his hand out, "Matthew, Matthew Patel."

Ramona then shook his hand and replied, "Ramona Flowers." They shared a moment of silence before Ramona continued, "Well, I've got to get going, see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah, see you tomorrow," He simply replied.

Ramona then walked off with a smile on her face. _Maybe this school isn't going to be that bad after all, _she thought to herself as Matthew looked on with a grin on his face.

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**A/N Well, thank all of you who voted in the poll on my profile! As you can tell, this story ended up winning it. Don't worry though, Family Values is still getting worked on. I've just got a tiny bit of writers block on it, should go away soon though! As you can tell this story is going to be what really happened between Ramona and all her exes. Not just the cheap five second explanation she gave Scott in the books! To be honest I really started this story with Lucas Lee in mind, I really wanted to write a story about what happened to him in the past. He is my favorite ex after all. I think all the ex's will get at least three chapters worth of explanation, some more, some less, I'm looking at you Todd Ingrim!**

**Well as always tell me what you thought about the new chapter if you don't mind! Also if you do it with a Portal or Resident Evil reference sprinkled in there you get internet points! Well, see you next time.**

**TrixieStixs! **


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